We Need More Moms Coaching

Last January, we created a post with a simple message: WE NEED MORE MOMS COACHING. On one of the popular Fastpitch Softball Facebook Groups, Coaching Softball, it took off like wildfire. Within an hour had over 300 likes, and to date 135 shares.

If ever you’ve walked around a softball tournament, not only are multiple games going on at the same time, but parents have ritually claimed their spots behind the backstop marked by camping chairs, umbrellas, and wagons full of snacks for what seems like 9 games their daughter will play that day.

There’s also one other observation worth noting. In the dugouts, you’ll find an overwhelming number of male coaches ranging from “bucket dads” to ex-baseball players sporting flat brims and sometimes beer bellies.

Before you cast judgment or feel offended because you’re a male and don’t fit either description, this is a generalization and does not assume this is the makeup of every coaching staff.

Back to the post where over 1,400 people liked or loved this idea that we do NEED MORE MOMS COACHING, we couldn’t agree more. And yes, universally we need more women coaching in general at all levels and all sports.

If you are a mom sitting behind that backstop keeping GameChanger, the scorebook, making announcements on AthletesGoLive, or following along pitch by pitch, guess what? You. Can. Coach.

We’ve found across the board in every female youth sport, there is a lack of female representation on the coaching staff.

Sadly, some of the reasons why are what is wrong in today’s youth sports climate.

Many people shared their beliefs on why there is a lack of women writing lineups. They stated:

• Parents don’t respect you.

• Females lack the confidence men do.

• Women coaches are not supported equally by parents.

• Umpires have a lack of respect regardless of playing/coaching experience.

• There is an imbalance of trust for female coaches vs male coaches.

• Tough to commit to coaching because moms carry the majority of household responsibilities on top of holding full-time jobs.

• There is a lack of respect for decision-making; lineups, game decisions, playing time, and player accountability.

• Parents take decisions personally. “If a man does it, he’s just a tough coach. If a woman does it, she hates my kid.”

• If a female coach gets upset, she is too emotional.

• If a male coach gets upset, he’s passionate.

So what’s the answer? How do we change the minds of so many qualified moms and women sitting on the sidelines when the lack of respect is assumed to be stacked against them?

First of all, the #1 reason why there is a lack of women coaching is because of PARENTS.

Think about that. If you are a current parent, the answer is in your behavior. Be vulnerable in your self-assessment and start by supporting coaches; this goes for all levels including college.

Leadership is lonely. Just imagine what you can do if and when you feel supported.

Follow and see how other platforms are encouraging support from parents in every sport. This is a universal issue that needs constant and immediate attention. Reformed Sports Project perfectly stated, “Let the coaches coach.” Consider following them @ReformedSptProj for more tips and insightful articles on making the transition from the seats to the sidelines.

The Sport Parent is another valuable resource @TheSportParent. Pinned to the top of their X account, they say, “The GREATEST sports parents are those who let the coaches coach, the officials officiate, are their children’s biggest support system, and spend more time and energy focusing on their child’s character, work ethic, and education, than anything else.” ~from @CoachKurtHines

It’s time we start to change how we treat and view female coaches at the youth levels. Not only does representation matter, but should your daughter go on to play at the next level, depending on the sport, there is also nearly a 50% chance, that she will have a female head coach according to a recent EADA report.

Again, patterns we see in youth softball are seen at the college level; except for this one very stat. Some players, and parents, will have a difficult time adapting to and respecting a collegiate female coach if this is the first time exposed to one. This is one of the reasons you see so many women coaches unfortunately leaving the profession.

But the reality is, moms, women, and former players can indeed coach. Having young girls see women in strong leadership roles is so important for the next generation. Confidence isn’t something you just do when you are young, but see.

We won’t sugarcoat anything. Yes, we fully believe, you can (and should) coach! And if you’re wondering, yes, this shit is hard and feels unforgiving at times. It’s an emotional and physical rollercoaster you can’t quite be prepared for, but then again, isn’t parenting?

If you are on the fence about coaching, take note, you have a support system in @SoftballClimate. We are here to be a resource, empower women coaches, and educate parents in the process. You are not alone. DM us at any time or go to our website www.softballclimate.com for additional contact information.

Here is some other advice if you’re a female coaching or an aspiring coach:

If you are an aspiring female coach, here are some resources we recommend and advice:

• Find and follow other platforms and social media accounts for tips, drills, and advice. A few we recommend are:

  • MegRem for drills and talking points @MegRemSoftball

  • Greg Berg for leadership advice @gb1121

  • Reformed Sports Project for perspective @ReformedSptPrj

  • Join National Fastpitch Coaches Association for education and resources @NFCAorg

  • Softball Climate for resources and consultations www.softballclimate.com.   

• Surround yourself with a supportive coaching staff and do background checks!

• Consider a balance of coaches filling in gaps of your weaknesses; ie, pitching, hitting, and defense.

• Be vulnerable and honest. Parents and players will likely be more supportive and empathetic when you front expectations, goals and

• Provide support and encouragement for players in all situations. They are attempting to gain their identity and not fear failure. How you respond matters.

• Association is key.

• Be willing to sacrifice wins for development.

• Have a parent code of conduct with expectations and hold parents accountable for poor behavior.

• Repeat after us, “I’m not coaching the girls (in softball), I’m coaching their confidence, their belief in themselves, and what they can achieve.”

Any way you look at it, we are role models. At the end of the day, youth sports are not only about skill development and competition but they are a trial run for life. We have just a few opportunities to show kids how to be positive role models, find success in vulnerability, and encourage them to believe in themselves.

You. Can. Coach. and we believe in you.

Like this article? Share on social media and follow us on X, Facebook, Instagram and LinkedIn. You can also find free resources and schedule a consultation with us www.softballclimate.com.